I’m a straight-shooter. I won’t candy-coat it. That plan you had… that vision of fatherhood… it’s irrelevant now. Go ahead and mourn. Go ahead and let yourself be angry. Affix blame on whomever you’d like. Yell at God a little, he can take it.
Are you done?
Now here’s the deal. Your son’s path will be different. I’m not saying he is incapable of anything. I believe our kids can do ANYTHING their hearts desire. But that’s the catch. It has to be something HIS heart desires, not yours.
He has to set the course. You have to let him steer the ship. The more you try to force him into your preconceived image of growing up, the more trouble you both will encounter.
Learn to be his foundation as opposed to his leader.
Let go of Little League if it doesn’t interest him. Try gymnastics if he enjoys it. Learn to find pleasure on the Merry-Go-Round if the roller coasters scare or overstimulate him. Let him watch Barney on TV even if all the other kids are watching Spiderman. Does it really matter that much?
Start scoring your days based on the number of times he smiles, rather than the number of times he acts like a typical kid.
And for God’s sake… go hug your wife.
Stop giving a crap about what anybody else thinks. Put your kid first. I mean really, honestly, completely put him first.
Then watch the miracles happen, my friend.